In 2007, I had an English class assignment to write a eulogy for a friend. I chose one of my high school best friends, Rab Menguito. He also wrote about me and closed with one of my favorite lines ever, “To those who knew her, no explanation is necessary. To those who did not, no explanation is possible.” I must say the same applies to Rab.
A Good-Bye to Rab Menguito
Rab Cedric Menguito in high school.
Well, yes, we are gathered here today to say good-bye to Rab Menguito. But we’re also here to send him off into his new life, and to celebrate the new beginning he finds in this end.
Each of us find many loves during our lifetime. Chocolate, a spouse, a secret lover, and sometimes, if we’re lucky, a true friend. Rab was my true friend, and I truly, deeply loved him. In fact, I still do, and I will continue to love him.
I met him freshman year in high school when we had two classes together. I was always glad to make friends, but I wasn’t expecting anything really special from Rab. He took me by surprise and became my best friend. He would listen to all my problems, cheer for me, praise me, and he would always be there. We could be silly together, and serious, too. He knew all the details about whatever boy I was into, whatever problems were plaguing me, and how I did on my last test. And he told me his secrets when he had them, too. He finally allowed himself to share his pain and his joy with me, and I was overjoyed and tickled when he found new love, and my heart broke when he worried needlessly like he always would, and when he told me of all the abuse he had to endure.
I wish Rab shared more with me, and I can only hope I was there for him like he was for me. Though I know Rab was grateful for me, I wish I could have been a better friend. I’m not satisfied with what I’ve done because he did so much for me. The only flaw he had, possibly, was that he made it so hard to match him, so hard to be as good a friend as he was. He is truly irreplaceable.
I still have all the notes he wrote me. With silly but beautiful drawings, encouragement, updates on his life, and all the sweet, funny little things he would say. Even when the paper decomposes, and Rab’s body fades away six feet into the ground and up into heaven, I’ll have him here with me in my thoughts and my heart. We all will. The most beautiful thing about Rab is that even though I had some perks as his best friend, basically, all the beautiful things he gave to me, he gave to all of you, too. It was impossible to not love Rab, I think. Anyone who could dislike him was, well, inhuman.
Rab was love and I’m so glad I can say that I had some love in my life. Rab is love, and that’s why he’ll always be here.
There really is no reason for us to be here. We’re putting Rab’s body away, but he’s still here in each and every one of our hearts. Rab has not died, and the only reason I’m going to cry tonight is because I won’t get to hug him or listen to his voice. But I know Rab is in heaven, and I can pray before I go to bed and ask God to tell Rab I said hello. Rab is happy now, even if he isn’t here anymore. But we’re still with him, and he’s still with us.
There is still love here. There is still life here. There is still Rab here (in my heart.)
